if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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