I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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