he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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