Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I just want to make out with him forever
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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