And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
