she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
