I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
