I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Randomize