He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I just found a bag of teeth...
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
