he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
