what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
you will always have a special place in my vag
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
