I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
