haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
