I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
