New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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