Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize