"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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