i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
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