So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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