the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
