**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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