oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
