Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
