Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Randomize
