its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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