Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize