Define "chronic" masturbator.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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