it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Randomize
