Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
