I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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