entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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