pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
