On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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