no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
