talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
