Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize