I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
