thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
