ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Acid is not a monday night drug
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
