You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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