butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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