this will be a night to untag.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
