wat bout pragnant strippers??
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize