Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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