would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I think i got beer on your cat.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
