my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Mom said you looked used
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
