My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Randomize
