I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Naked Twister starts at high noon
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize