please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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