I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Randomize
