Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
