When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
